Friday, March 24, 2006

THE BIG DANCE: WHY THE NCAA TOURNAMENT IS LIKE YOUR WEDDING (SERIOUSLY) PART III

No. No. No. No. NO.

How did this happen?!?!

Duke and Gonzaga???? My bracket is now officially crap, and I know I won't win the office pool (not that I had much of a chance before that).

So two of the tournament's "dream-teams" -- complete with the "dream players" (J.J. Redick and Adam Morrison) -- went down in flames.

What's interesting about this observation (in the context of weddings, of course), is that NO MATTER HOW PERFECT PEOPLE MAY APPEAR, THEY'RE REAL--JUST LIKE YOU AND ME--AND NO ONE. CAN EVER. BE PERFECT.

Unlike my previous posts, I'm no longer talking about this in the context of YOUR wedding--but the celebrations of your best friend, or closest cousin.

Whether it's expressly stated (not often) or just beneath the surface (much of the time), I find that, there is an inherent level of competition among my friends (and from what I've heard from friends of friends) when it comes to weddings and that feeling of "topping" those who have come before you--or even, that "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality...

It's important to remember that no matter how PERFECT someone's wedding (or wedding planning) may seem, it never is. Sure, you may go to your cousin's wedding and think to yourself "This is unreal -- it must have cost so much money to pull this off -- how am I ever going to have anything comparable?" or you may see your best friend's cake in a photograph and think "Gee -- having a wedding cake in the design of a tiffany's box is such awesome design -- why didn't *I* think of that?!" -- but just remember that there is no such thing as "perfect" -- and everyone else is comparison shopping, too.

Therefore, to bring this full circle -- J. J. Redick and Adam Morrison may be AMAZING players, but they're just as vulnerable as anyone else. No matter how on top of things or "perfect" you think your friends are with regard to their planning--and the choices they make--things go wrong, choices made aren't always the best ones, and life goes on.

So next time you hear from your gabby friend how amazingly well her planning is going (and you're sitting and stressing about your own and how much left you have to get done), stop. Take a breath. And realize that WE ARE ALL HUMAN. J. J Redick and Adam Morrison included. Everyone makes mistakes, and everyone compares themselves to everyone else.

When you think about your wedding planning in that context, it makes it a little more bearable to deal with those friends and even family members who may front like everything is perfect. Because you have to remember, that even the greatest players have a bad day.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The other thing that goes along with this is that different people have Different Ideas of what they like, and it's not at all constructive to criticize their ideas. My friend, for example, had a relatively unconventional wedding, which had a lot of elements I didn't necessarily like all that much, and I'm going to have a fairly conventional/religious wedding, which she is probably going to roll her eyes at some elements of. But we're (well, hopefully I was, and she definitely is) just being supportive of each other, not judgemental. My mom, on the other hand... but that's a different story :)