Saturday, January 12, 2008


So you all may remember why, back in the early days of my posting, I started this blog in the first place.

For those of you who don't feel like doing back-reading, the gist is this: TallGuy and I had planned an exotic trip abroad. My then-good friend from work told me the weekend of her wedding would fall on one of the days we would be away. TallGuy and I re-arranged our trip plans to be able to attend her wedding, which meant losing the hotel we had really wanted. My then-good friend was really appreciative, and told me she was looking forward to our being at her wedding. Months pass, and I hear less and less of my then-good friend (who decided her planning was more important than anything else, including keeping up her friendships). I eventually get an invitation in the mail addressed to ME - with no mention of TallGuy OR "and Guest". A feeble e-mail followed 2 weeks later from my "ex" -- "apologizing" for not inviting TallGuy, and telling me that because we were not engaged or married, she and her then-fiance could not invite us, as they had to only invite others in this category.

OK - that wasn't really a gist. BUT, I had to give some background so we can have a good disussion of the "PLUS ONE" CONUNDRUM.

When TallGuy and I initially sat down to draft a guest list, one of the important things for us was to make sure that all of our friends--whether single, dating, engaged, or married--were invited with a guest.

This meant that our parents had to cut down their lists accordingly. We had a target number we wanted to reach, and our parents were understanding about the fact that our friends would come first, WITH guest.

I know that inviting people with guests is not always possible. Budget plays a major role.

However, how you TREAT your friends is really the key to ensuring that they won't be offended if they are not invited with a guest.

My "ex" friend didn't bother to tell me that TallGuy would not be invited--even though she intimated he would be after we re-arranged our trip for the wedding. And her lame attempt at excusing her actions, in an email no less, did nothing to ameliorate the situation.

The last straw? I never saw her at her wedding, which I decided to attend. She and her fiance never came by each table to say hello.

Pretty apalling.

I'll re-visit the PLUS ONE CONUNDRUM in another post - particularly as how it has related to my own wedding invitations.

Stay tuned!

No comments: