Wednesday, January 23, 2008


It's hard to believe, but my shower/bachelorette party are in less than a month.


I JUST feel like I got engaged -- how is it possible that this is happening so quickly?!?!

Don't get me wrong -- I'm super psyched -- I just can't believe how time has flown.

As I look forward to my shower and bachelorette, I've been trying VERY hard to keep my friends in mind.

A long time ago, I talked about "add ons" -- and how it's not simply the wedding present that creates cost to friends/family invited to and attending the wedding and related activities.

It's the shower gift. The $100+ ladies plunk down on bachelorette "stuff" (drinks, dinner out, etc. etc.) Flights or train tickets for out of towners. Hotel stays.

The cost can become immeausrable, in some respect. And I understand it. I've been through it!

In terms of my shower/bachelorette weekend, I'm THRILLED that 90% of the friends I invited will be attending.

Many of these friends are from out of town, which is another complication, since NYC hotels cost at least $250-300 a night if you don't want to sleep in a rat-infested box.

Here is how I am trying to avoid being "THAT BRIDE"

1. TallGuy and I are going to stay at my parents' place the weekend of the shower/bachelorette -- and I have invited 3 of my friends (flying/traveling from out of town) to stay at my apartment (beds, air mattresses, or however it needs to happen). This will cut any hotel costs, which is a HUGE add-on -- at least in NYC.

2. I've made it very clear to my sister (who is planning the bachelorette party) that we need to cap the amount that dinner/drinks will cost. Although it's a NYC affair, we're trying to find places that are REASONABLE--relatively speaking.

3. I've asked my sister to not have the others pay for my dinner/drinks out -- even if she includes it on her tab, I told her I'd pay her back. I don't need people paying for me, as gracious as it is for people to try and do it. Plus -- I'm such a lightweight, one or two martinis will do me in -- and that's FINE BY ME. No need to have drink after drink after drink....although I plan on having a lot of fun, I know my limit!

These are some of the ideas I have so far in terms of how I can cut others' costs.

We'll see how the weekend goes, and what it actually ends up being in terms of dollars. I am gratified that so many of my friends are making the trip to celebrate--whether it be from Brooklyn or Atlanta---so I really hope that these ideas will help make people feel like they aren't paying for too many "add ons".

Stay tuned!


purple haired puppet lady said...

My mom hosted a casual tea for me, when I got married last summer. My bridesmaid & myself decided that we'd rather spend the time relaxing together - rather than spending $$$ in a club or restaurant. It's not for everyone - but it worked great for me :-)

Neil Cowley said...

""The cost can become immeausrable""

Equal to the value of time with good friends I hope.

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